What are amazed dreams about?

This happened 2 months ago but it's still amazingly vivid. She was not what I would normally consider my dream girl (pun inteneded) and yet there she was.

I was going through a major depressive episode at the time. At first realizing it was a dream bummed me out, however the feeling of being THAT in love nearly single handedly brought me out of it. even if it was all fake.

I was living at my grandparents house in rural arkansas as I did a lot throughout my teenage years. However that where the familiarity with the setting ended.

I spent the early part of the day working on my motorcycle (I dont own a motorcycle lol) I was having some problems with the engine(after waking up I realised it was the spark plug). but despite these problem I was intent on riding it. I geared up and set off on a cruise.

After what was both simultaneously hours and seconds I broke down on the side of the road, with a dead phone. A helmeted biker drives up to me and says their brother is a mechanic and can help me out. I accept their offer and they tow me to their house while I ride on the back of their motercycle(how you tow a bike with a bike is a mystery to me).

It was at this point I realised the biker was female while holding onto her. She was wearing biker leathers and a helmet so at first so I hadn't noticed.

She takes me up a nearby "mountain" that I had assumed was miles away but we somehow got there in a few minutes of curvy roads. I meet her brother he takes the bike to the garage and says it will be ready tomorrow. This is when she finally removes her helmet.

She was middle eastern, with soft chestnut brown hair that reached her lower back. Her face is the only thing that is a little blurry but I remember her eyes were a shade of hazel eyes that seemed to both reflect and capture the sun.

Her body was tall and lean, im a little over 6'0 but she was close to my height. About 5'10 if I had to guess. While she was certainly lean she wasn't scrawny. Her hips still found a way to curve into a way that made it near impossible to resist placing my hands. At first glance she looked frail and yet She had am impressive array of muscles. Like a track and field athlete.I wouldn't really describe her as sexy or hot. She was magnetic, elegant, like some kind of desert royalty.

All that to say she was attractive. But love isn't born from the outside. Her personality was amazing. She was tomboyish in nature. Often covered in oil from her bike or cuts from exploring the mountains. And yet she didn't sacrifice all of her femininity. And my god was she funny. Is it narcissistic to laugh in a dream. That's just me laughing at my own jokes. But I digress. We were a good match

I can't remember why but I ended up living with her for a few months. We spent a lot of time working on bikes and cars together. Watching movies in her living room. Playing outside. Until eventually it became a romantic relationship. We went on motercycle rides, picnics, and all sorts of dates.

I was so happy that I cant even describe it without feeling like my chest will explode.

We were in the middle of talking, cuddling on the couch just enjoying eachothers company when my alarm went off.

After coming to my senses I felt a heartbreak so real that saying it was a dream doesn't seem possible.

I've never been in any relationship that's worth mentioning. I've never been in love. I'm not sure how close that was to the real thing but I lm very happy and grateful to have experiences even this faux love.

When I woke up in my dream I was standing in a huge grass field with a mansion behind me. My father was sitting in a lawn chair next to me and told me to go hide because the war was starting. I went over to a little bridge with water underneath. Grabbed a bucket and got into the water with the bucket over my head. I stayed there for about 5 mins. I remember hearing my breath in the bucket and feeling cold from the water. When the 5 mins passed, I got out and my looked for my dad. When I found him, he immediately told me to go back to the water because round 2 was starting. I grabbed the bucket again but before I had the chance to get into the water, a woman grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the mansion. She explained that "I wasn't supposed to be here." She led me to a very tall man in a blue suit. He took me to the front lawn and pulled out a gun. He told me that I can shoot myself or he would do it because I needed to leave. I decided to do it. I put the gun to my head and pulled the trigger. All the sudden bright lights were around me and I started floating. I felt so warm, like nothing has ever affected me before. It was actually an amazing feeling. I slowly woke up from this dream. Not panicked at all.

But I'm truly curious as to why I didn't wake up once I pulled the trigger? Also, No part of me is suicidal.

I absolutely am awestruck right now.

Long story short, I cannot believe I am in my bed right now after this dream. I am mentally not okay and probably will be scarred for life.

I'll spare the details but I had the weirdest, goriest, and most realistic dream of my life. On top of that it was a dream, within a dream, within another fucking dream.

I dreamed I was an American special agent alone inside a nazi compound tasked with getting some kind of document, killing as many as I could and extracting myself.

It was lucid and I was totally in control. I thought I was actually there... I killed at least 15 men and women with a knife. It felt so real.. I've never stabbed anyone and never plan to but holy shit if I did now I would already know what it feels like. Bones cracking. Blood squirting. I mean I was relentlessly slitting throats and stabbing eyes and killing people in their sleep.

I even stabbed one nazi so many times my knife broke and I grabbed his knife off of him and kept stabbing.

Guys it was unbelievably real in the moment. I cant get over the flashes in my mind of what I did.

On top of that I woke up from that dream into another where I explained what the dream I just had to someone else.

IDK GUYS SHIT IS FUCKED UP AND IVE NEVER HAD ANYTHING LIKE THIS HAPPEN TO ME AND I NEED TO FUCKING TELL SOMEONE. But how do you tell someone you brutally killed a lot of people in a dream? I'm fuckin scared lowkey.

I need advice.

There is a music festival going on in my front yard. I am with my girlfriend and an ex-friend, who we treat as if she was still our friend. We are walking down the street and decide to go into my neighbor's house and spend the night there. There is only one room open, as if it were a motel. There is nothing in there except a large bed and TV placed in a cabinet. The three of us drop off our bags and go back outside to the festival. It is small, but enjoyable. I spot a group of 20-something year olds under a white tent. They are lounging without a care, surrounded by racks of water balloons. My girlfriend tells me to get a water balloon, so I go up to them. I ask and a woman agrees. She takes one off, then pops it into a large fancy bowl and hands it to me saying, "This is called Dragon Fire Bowl." A guy with her warns her, "Are you sure? Even a drop of that could-" Then he cuts off. The liquid is orange like pop. She encourages me to try some. It tastes amazing! I am addicted to it. I go back to my friends and we retire to the little room. I realized all too late that I finished the drink without sharing.

From here on, the dream cuts like scenes in a movie. It is night. Now I am in my real house watching a concert from my window. It is extravagant, with dancers and bright lights. Suddenly the people who gave me the drink appear in the next room. One of them asks, "Are you feeling ok?"

My dream cuts again. I am back in the small room, but no one is in there. I stand in the corner with blurry vision and a sick feeling. I figure I am just drunk, nothing to worry about. I realize it is really late at night. My brother and a couple of his friends bust in the room, loud, and probably drunk themselves. I mumble something about the drink and Nick is concerned I was poisoned. I assure him it was just pop. They leave and I vomit in my corner.

Next scene, I am still in the same room sitting on the bed with my grandfather. He came to fix the TV. He put on my favorite show, *Supernatural*. We tune in right as an angel is murdering a demon. My grandfather mentions how gruesome the show is. I don't think it's too bad. Suddenly my view becomes more entranced with the show until it is all I see. My view is on the dead demon, who is oozing pink blood from his neck. My sight is like a camera, panning back up to the angel's face. I am the angel. (If you care, the song "Academy Award" by Franz Ferdinand starts playing to set the eerie mood). I can tell I am older than I am in real life, maybe late twenties or early thirties. My hair was cut short and I am wearing nice clothing. With the blade in my hand, I ascend up the stairs. The mansion I am now in was under construction. Sheets hung over a grand window on the stair landing, but a bright white light was breaking through.

I make it to the stop of the long stairway. It is dark here and tinted with a blue filter. I enter a room. A grey pitbull is standing before me, guarding a cradle. The dog growls at me and I realize I am a threat. I move forward without fear and the dog whimpers away. I place my hand on the cradle railing and look down at the baby boy, but from my view I never actually saw the child. I raise my hand with the blade. The dog growls again. I snap my fingers and it rushed out of the room. Before I stab, my side vibrates. It is my phone. I check it and see my girlfriend texted me, "I thought we were going to go to therapy today."

I break from my murderous trance, dropping the blade and holding my spinning head. I realize that was my girlfriend's father downstairs I just killed and that is my son in the cradle. My mind is consumed with darkness, I realize how evil I am. My life is over. How could I do that to my girlfriend?! I seriously think all of this is real. I blink as hard as I can and wake up in a cold sweat.

What does all of that mean? I had this dream a while back, but it has stuck with me as clear as day.

Everything is written above